Should I Be over it by now.?

WE've been married about a year or so now. But a little mor thatn 2 yrs ago were were dating and broke up for 3 months. Well he broke up with me, just changed from one day to the next. I felt like he was leading me on. I was just miserable i've never cried like that for anyone. I lost 12 lbs and once got sent home from work for being "somewhere else" mentally. I had no focus. I got to a better place and then he wanted me back. I was hesitant but it was what I wanted, what I had always wanted. Physically there were others for him, I dated, kissed that was it. Were young,23 should I still be hurt. I don't try to make him feel guilty. I don't even talk about it. But I can think about that time and just start crying. Am I being a child, should I have let it go already? Were married now. When we broke up he told me " I don't love you". I have that day memorized like a movie I can repeat every word he said to me.